My child is struggling 
Now that my child has 
For example, due to our kids with disabilities getting the programs and remediation they need, we weren’t able to participate in our local youth sports. But our typical learner was saying, “Hey, I want to play soccer.” We weren’t able to do a team but we’re able to get her involved in some soccer skills [training] that fit in with our schedule.
I have to say that’s really the balancing act that we just try to do – provide activities for them where they can shine and tap into their strengths. And that’s what we as a family unit keep trying to do. But I’m also encouraged to know that there may be some places [resources] I can turn to when my kids get older.
Candace Cortiella: Terrific. So do you both have any parting tips for other parents who are facing the challenge of raising multiple children with disabilities (such as learning disabilities) and other children who are typically developing.
Julie Buick: [I’d just reiterate] that it’s important to focus on the strengths and abilities of children with disabilities and then engage them within their school district, within their community and align them with people and with friends who have those same interests.
Early on, we lived more or less “by the label” because we were getting so many diagnoses [“labels”] for our children. And because getting services at school has to be deficit-based based and about the disability. So you start to get into the zone of thinking about the label and you’re saying your child is only about deficits and where they’re struggling.
But as soon as we were able to look at it differently (and thank goodness we did that earlier on,) we were able to see our children outside of their labels. And that’s really what we do; we embrace our children for their abilities and their strengths. I think that’s key because when you do that, it really shows respect and dignity for all your children (those with and without disabilities). And it allows you to give what each child needs individually.
So I would say, looking at your child outside the label and really looking at his or her strengths abilities, is key. That’s something that I would like to leave you with today.
Andy Kavulich: It’s also really important to be on the same page with your spouse. It’s been a blessing that my wife and I are really in it together and therefore, we’re able to help the kids where they are and keep evaluating where they need to go.
I’ve seen other situations with parents who were not on the same page, and it really can be a tough struggle. So I can hear through Julie’s comments that obviously she’s on the same page with her husband. Once you understand that working together as a team will help you move forward [you can] do what’s best for your children.
Candace Cortiella: That’s wonderful advice. Thank you both for joining us and thank you for your work on behalf of the National Center for Learning Disabilities Parent-Leader Team.
The Parent Leaders Team is part of NCLD's Parents as Advocates program. The team serves in an informal advisory capacity, giving input and feedback on prevailing and emerging issues that stand in the way of children receiving the support they need to succeed.
This transcription was made possible by a grant from the American Legion Child Welfare Foundation.
