My child is struggling 
Now that my child has 
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When Seeking Help outside the School
What if you find you need more help than the school is able to provide? How can you go about finding a reputable person? Here are some options.- Consult other parents. "Word of mouth can be very helpful," says Auciello. "Get a real sense from someone you might trust – another family. Find out firsthand who other folks have found to be helpful and sensitive and invested." But remember that one size doesn't fit all.
- Ask the school. "Every child is also obviously entitled to have an evaluation through their district," says Auciello. "That includes not just the learning piece, but also the psychological piece."
- Search the Internet. Search for professionals using keywords such as "counselor," "psychologist," or "therapist," advises Martinez. Check to see if the professional has received high ratings and is near where you live. "Then call and see how much time they give you on the phone."
Ask questions upfront. Ask about the person's therapeutic orientation. In other words, what types of treatment do they offer and what is their experience with different types of challenges, such as LD? These are other questions to consider:
- Is the therapist licensed in your state?
- Is she or he credentialed in psychology, social work, or psychiatry?
- Will your insurance cover this care?
- Does this therapist have experience with children or teens?
- What are the therapist's policies with regard to cancellation or emergency contact?
- Will this person's personality be a good match for your child?
Tread carefully. A child or teen with LD may already be dealing with self-esteem issues, says Beetar. "To be identified as needing counseling could intensify feelings of poor self-worth." Be sure to be honest and prepare your child for the first visit.
Establish trust. It is fine to meet with a few counselors to see which one may be the best fit, says Beetar. Establishing trust is always important, but crucial with adolescents, he says. "I always tell parents and older adolescents that they are the consumers in this process." With them, make sure there are explicit rules about confidentiality. "If the student sees that he or she can trust the counselor, there's a better chance for success," he says.
Seek and practice empathy. Whether it's you or the professional your child is working with, empathy is key. Remember that most kids are doing their very best. It can help to think about how you would react if you had a hard time reading or completing your schoolwork.
"I might want to escape, too, if you made me walk across town with a 100-pound backpack on," says Auciello. "I'd probably find another way to get there. The same is true for a child with LD: There is often a good reason for avoidance. Don't assume that it's laziness or lack of interest."
As best you can, try to understand things from your child's perspective. Try to figure out the triggers for frustration and emotional difficulties. "Take a close look at what is leading to these situations," says Auciello. "Try to be flexible about making changes and providing support that's appropriate and not enabling." Along with any professional support, this can go a long way toward helping your child make progress toward having a healthier – and much happier – life.
Additional Resources
- American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry
- KidsHealth from Nemours: "Taking Your Child to a Therapist"
- National Association of School Psychologists
Annie Stuart is a freelance writer and editor with nearly 25 years of experience. She specializes in consumer health, parenting, and learning disabilities, among other areas.
