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Feel free to ask the teacher to supply the tutor with examples of your child’s work or tests. This is an excellent way for the tutor to get a handle on your child’s difficulties. It’s also extremely helpful for the tutor and teacher to communicate about your child’s strengths and weaknesses. The tutor needs to understand the teacher’s expectations — as do you and your child. Keep the tutor posted on any feedback you get from teachers about your child’s work.
It’s extremely helpful if your child and the tutor, in conversations with you and your child’s teacher, set several achievable, short-term goals. For example: keeping a planner up to date, setting and meeting interim goals for a bigger project, annotating or taking notes about a book, or proofreading a paper before it is handed in.
Include Your Child
As with any other change you want to make in your child’s life, getting his or her buy-in is crucial. Your child may not be thrilled by the idea of working with a tutor, but the process will be much easier if you discuss it in advance. Explain your reasons (and a teacher’s reasons) for thinking your child would benefit from tutoring. Discuss the purpose of tutoring and the ways you would expect a tutor to help your child.
If you are hiring a tutor yourself, be sure to allow your child and the prospective tutor to meet and talk together during the interview. Involve your child in the selection process. See how your child and the tutor interact when they first meet. Does this seem like a person who will work well with your child?
It’s crucial for your child and the tutor to develop a productive, mutually respectful relationship. Such a relationship takes time, but the essential chemistry between child and tutor needs to be right.
Issues to Consider
When you are selecting a tutor yourself, you’ll want to consider various issues that are particularly important to you and your family. For example:
Logistics. Will the tutor come to your home or your school, or will you need to take your child to the tutor’s home, a library or other meeting place, or a tutoring center? It’s easiest when a tutor comes to your home or school. But if you can provide transportation, consider whether a change of scene may help your child focus.
How long will sessions be? How many days of the week? What is the tutor’s policy about cancelled sessions?
Communication. Will the tutor commit to being in regular contact with you and your child’s teacher, or will you and the teacher be expected to contact the tutor? Is the tutor available to talk with you on the phone or via email? If needed, could the tutor attend school meetings and IEP conferences? (For any services beyond the actual tutoring session, ask about extra fees.)
Costs. You may need to comparison shop to find a suitable tutor or tutoring agency with an acceptable hourly rate. Ask about other costs, such as for materials. Find out if you must pay at the end of each session, or if the tutor or agency can bill you. See if the tutor or agency charges for sessions cancelled with short notice.
Flexibility. Is the tutor comfortable with the occasional changed day, time, or length of session, and with adding or subtracting sessions? There may be times — such as before exams or when large projects are assigned — when you’ll want your child to have more tutoring than usual. At other times, you may want to reduce the number of sessions.
Talk Regularly with Your Child
Keep the dialogue going after your child begins working with a tutor. Talk through any conflicts or difficulties; ask about what’s been fun or helpful about the sessions. Don’t overreact if your child complains about the extra time and work involved in tutoring. Monitor your child’s relationship with the tutor, but realize that building that relationship will take time. Your child’s willingness to continue with tutoring will probably increase as she or he sees improvements or feels less anxiety about school.
Encourage your child to speak up — to ask the tutor questions, request specific help, make suggestions about how tutoring sessions could be improved, and let you know how things are going.
Make clear that you expect your child to cooperate with the tutor, but keep tabs on your child’s progress. Make sure your child is comfortable with the tutor.
What to Expect from Tutoring
Tutoring should not be solely about getting better grades. A tutor should help your child improve skills and develop more effective ways to study and to get homework done. A tutor who does your child’s homework isn’t helping your child be a successful learner.
Resolve to be patient with both your child and the tutor. Your child’s progress depends on many things: the number of sessions, a tutor’s strategies, your child’s cooperation and mood, the assistance of teachers, and the help and support you provide as a parent. With luck, your child will develop a friendly, trusting relationship with a sensitive, flexible adult who can guide your child toward academic independence.
Download this handy worksheet and use it when interviewing a potential tutor.
Bonnie Z. Goldsmith has worked in the field of education throughout her professional life. She has wide experience as a writer, editor, and teacher.
This article is made possible by a grant from the Oak Foundation.
